weekends

I could write a weekend recap, but why when Alyssa already did? All I have to add is that bar hopping within walking distance of the place you are going to sleep later is pretty awesome, waffles + chicken is a damn fine idea (thank you, Roscoe), seeing old friends who you haven’t seen in years is both weird and fun, and I should spend more time with cute boys that karaoke. Well, maybe just one boy in particular. Maybe.

This upcoming weekend I’m making a pretty much last minute trip to Massachusetts with my dad to see my family. My grandmother has been in the hospital since, oh, December I think. She broke her foot and then had to go into the nursing home and then got an infection and then … shit went down. She’s still in the hospital (she’s moved hospitals) and it’s almost March now. From what I hear she’s doing better, but for awhile the doctors just didn’t know what the hell was going on with her and if she would even make it. We got a message on our machine today from my Aunt Joyce saying that she was doing okay, but that she thought she saw my dad there and she was saying hello to him and smiling. It sounded kind of eerie to me, I can’t explain it. But it will be good to see her, even though I fear it might be for the last time. I’m not quite sure how to feel about it yet. I’ve just been going through each day until we leave and I’ll deal with it when it comes. Oh, crazy feelings. I don’t know what to do with you. I’m sad that she’s been so ill, but I’ll be happy to see her. But I’ll be thinking, is this the last time I’m going to see her? I’ve never had anyone close to me die before, or really been close to death, that I’m not sure how to deal with it quite yet. Not that she’s even gone yet! Maybe I’m just getting ahead of myself. Babble, babble. Blargh, blargh. I’m depressing myself. I’m going to bed.