an open response to those that ask us for love advice:

hey dude, forget her, she's using you.
she sounds like she's being a ho.
she doesn't want to go out with you.
maybe you shouldn't worry so much.

does it really matter if he says, "i love you"?
we don't know where millionare men live or how to find them.
he's got a girlfriend, date someone else.

the letters:


I am 25 years old. I start to fall in love with a woman of 33 years old. This is a first time in my life that a feeling like this happens to me. Though I tell myself many times that I am doing something crazy and impossible, I still cannot forget her. She treats me so good that I cannot control myself but it may be also due to her sexual attractiveness. However, one night, when asked why she did not take her car to go outside, she said with a smile that her boyfriend would take her back home because she would comeback late at night. It really shocked me. I don't understand what she has done for me is a question of normal relationship or a question of love. Many times when talking with me that she put off the phone when someone called her (maybe her boy friend) and just say it is nothing but really told me that her boyfriend called her. She never hesitates to use the word boy friend in front of me but she shows sometimes very sexually attractive to me. Her behavior to me makes me very confusing. However, I would like to stay away from her but I still cannot forget her. WE have to meet each other two times per week because of the office work. What should I do?

I thank you for your kind consideration and waiting for your help


Hi there,

I have love question and I really hope that someone will help me to find an answer.

I have a boyfriend and we are with each other for more than one year and he still does not know if he loves me or not.

I actually asked him only once but I did not expect the answer he gave me. I know that he really cares about me and will do anything for

Me but he is not sure if he loves me but on the other hand he wants to be with me. It is so hard for me to understand and I am not sure if I should

Be with him or not or do something else.

Please help me.

Kind regards,



hi i will try to make this as simple as possible,i give this women who i love very much an engagement & wedding ring and she said that she wanted it and accepted it and said that she wanted to get married in sept. of this year and that she loved me very much,well she wasn't wearing it after i give it to her and i called her over the phone and asked if she was going to wear it and she said that she would wear it,the next day i get an email from her and she is real mad and saying that i am accusing her of running around(which i wasn't or implyed that at all) and that i am an insecure person for asking about the ring and that i don't trust her judgement and that we will not have any communication for thirtey days,and her dad has been real sick and he passed away 6/26/2003 which is just a few days ago(he had a stroke last year and she knew that his body was shutting down) and she really didn't speak to me at the funeral at all(all she said to me was hi) and i know that has really been a burden on her shoulders and i can undrstand that(her folks live in mich.) and she lives in ky. and i live in mich. i went down there about three weeks ago and gave it to her and while i was down there she wasn't wearing it(it didn't hit me then) and she works at a hospital doing cleaning and she said that she was afraid of breaking it(the stone off)i am retired from the phone company and i have been making trips down to ky. to see her,her husband passed away in 96 and my wife passed away in 02 and we started talking after my wife passed away and started to hit it off (i thougth) we have known each other sinse we were teenagers i am 59 and she is 58, am i stupid or what ? or am i missing something here? i allways felt that when you give a ring to a women you love and she asked for me to buy the rings for her that she would wear it and be happy and not give me the third degree i feel like a little kid now sinse she woun't talk to me for thirtey days,one other thing i worship the ground she walks on i treat her like a lady i open doors for her and everything else that i can think of to show her respect because that is the way i believe in treating a women, i hope that i have made sense to you in this matter---bottom line have i missed something in our relasonship that you can clue me in on i am not mad at her for doing this to me i am just hurt real bad and i can't understand why she got mad about this i figure that we all have our faults and that people have to accept other people for what they are ---my email is r* if you reply by such


Dear Alyssa & Mary

I found in Internet Your advices site and its realy very smart and wise advices. But I will be very grateful You if You tell me addresses of internet-sites where I can meet millionaires for friendship.

Thank You




There is this guy who I'am madly in love with. He has a girlfriend at this time, but after he breaks up with her I'd really like to go out with him. I've had dreams about him and having a romance with him. He likes me as a friend but not like he'd go out with me our anything, because he doesn't know me to well. I'am very shy and don't know what to say to start a conversation. What do you think would be a good way to start conversation and get to know him? How do you get a guy to really like you? Please tell me what you think and write back.

~*~ A. ~*~


im a male . I asked a women friend of mine from work on a date and she was very surprised. So i told her to think about it and let me know.After two days i still had no reply so i sent her an e.mail telling her how i felt about her and she sent one back saying she was not into dating and that she was and is in a long term realationship for some years. And she said she hoped that we could still be friends. She was married and has been seprated from her husband for a number of years and she did spend some time in another realationship which also broke up. But i have been told by someone that knows her well that she is not seeing anyone at the moment . Why would she be lying to me could it be that after two realationship breakups that shes afraid of being hurt again .Should i wait for a couple of months and ask her again or would i be wasting my time .I really care about this women so if you could help please .


Dear the plain jane,

I am a 21-year-old Chinese guy who is in love with a 22-year-old girl. We are classmates at university and that is how we got to know each other. When we were in Year 1, our timetables were not the same, so we did not have many opportunities to see each other (perhaps just 5 hours or so per week). But I still managed to observe her clearly--she is confident, independent, approachable and always happy. At first, I only thought that she is such an attractive girl but had not fallen in love with her yet.

Then during the second semester of that year, I gave a party at my house, inviting many classmates, including her, to come. We had a good time and the relationship between she and I improved because of that. Suddenly, I found that I love her! Yet, until now, I still have not expressed my love for her yet.

During the summer vacation that followed, I kept contacting her. She told me a piece of heartbreaking news--she would be exchanged to America to study for one year. One day, she asked me to go to church with her and of course I did. Thereafter, I went to church with her a few more times. She asked me why I went with her since I am not a Christian. I just failed to give her an answer.

I promised myself to send her at least 2 emails per month during the year when she was in America, no matter how busy I was. In the end, I sent about 20. I wrote every single one of them with sincerity. It seemed that she was not very eager to write to me at first, but gradually, I felt that she became more and more willing to do so.

About a month before she came back, she emailed me, asking me for my updates and telling me when she would return. That was the first time she took the initiative to write to me. It so happened that around 3 weeks before her return, I went to France to take a 3-week summer course. Before I left, I sent her an ecard and she replied that I have been a great friend of her.

After I returned, she called me to ask me to go to the library with her to do some research for our Honors Project. That was the only time I saw her ever since she came back 2 months ago. A few days after I met her, she went to Japan and stayed there for 17 days. So, I waited patiently for her again.

After these 17 days, I called her and asked her to go to the library with me, but she said she had not decided yet and that she would call me if she wanted to go. I could not stand being so passive, so I called her again the next day to ask her. This time she said no. Then, I asked her to dine out with me, but suddenly her mobile phone did not work properly and I lost touch with her.

I did not give up and emailed her. She told me that she was busy every day and not sure whether she could have dinner with me. Then, I sent her another email to suggest a day. She said everything was undecided, so she could not answer me, but she might go to the library the next afternoon. I asked her to email me or call me if she really went there, but there was no response. I went there the next day to try my luck, but did not see her. I was extremely disappointed.

I surely will tell her that I love her someday, but I strongly believe that true love must be based on true friendship. It is very risky to express my love for her if she does not even consider me her friend. That is why I have always been trying my best to be her most loyal friend. I think I am doing quite well in this respect. Our friendship did not disappear because of one year of separation, but was strengthened because of my sincerity and insistence.

The problem, however, is that she is so fickle. Sometimes, it seems that she is most willing to be with me. Yet, sometimes, it seems that she is trying to refuse or even escape from me. Why is she like that? What can I do?

Also, is it possible that she suspects that I love her? If so, what should I do? I do not think it is time for me to tell her tell her that I love her.

Do you agree to what I am doing?

Next semester will begin very soon and I will have plenty of opportunities to see her because our timetables are similar this time. This will be our final year at university and I do not want to waste any more opportunities. I am so confused, so worried!

Thank you very much!